OMGZ EXCLUSIVE OC NEWS!!!
Clarissa Cooper is coming back... YOU HEARD IT RIGHT! Mischa Barton is set to return to the show she got fired from because everyone realised how many mindless drones she brought to the user figures! And I have the very first exclusive publicity photo from her return, in the Season 4 finale episode!!!!1
L to R: Marissa Cooper (Mischa Barton) is greeted by Seth Cohen (some guy) in the Season 4 finale of WB's OC on the CW.
But seriously, though, folks, how shit is she? I mean, the twig in the above still could do a more convincing job than her. In fact, equating to her to a twig deals a serious insult to the twig itself.
More to the point, is there a shitter show on television than The OC? I've just been watching a handful of episodes from Season 3 because everyone I know watches it and I thought, "They must see SOMETHING in it" but it turns out that no, it's shit. They're all called stupid names like Marissa and Seth and Sandy and Shanique and they're all white. Even Shanique. What kind of post millenial society are we living in where the best teen soap opera is made up of a bunch of rich white kids who think that the only way to escape a jail sentence is to sail away to Hawaii or somewhere else that doesn't matter? Some dude's answering machine is like, "Hey, it's 2005, you know what to do." IS IT? 'Cos last I heard rich black guys did actually exist. As did poor people.
This show's idea of diversity revolves around one desperately pretty character who goes to the same school Marissa gets forced into when she gets kicked out of her posh school for shooting someone. IN SELF DEFENCE. Anyway, aside from that ludicrous plot-point, Marissa's friend's uncle is a fisherman, 'cos they're poor, y'see, and he thinks that, instead of going to college and gets a degree, he's just going to become a professional surfer and get lots of sponsorship. AND THIS IS WRITTEN IN ALL SERIOUSNESS.
The OC is a blight on our society. It should be banned for crimes against humanity and its creators should be shipped off to Guantanamo Bay, 'cos they're the real terrorists.
But if we do ship Mischa Barton to Guantanamo, can I just ask, pretty please, if someone could arrange to have her torture video up on YouTube? A world of people are just dying to see it.
The OC should have been culled after season 2. And Mischa Barton needs a voice coach to iron out those none-more-neurotic vowels. GOD SHE'S SO ANNOYING.
At least we can always rely on Hollyoaks to up the ante on embarrassing and discriminatory storylines.
Posted by
Kat |
6:56 AM